Tuesday, December 31, 2013


Dear 2013,

You were quite something, Mister.  During our time together, I got married, lost two good friends, got cancer, kicked cancer's ass, shot a couple of Feature Films, continued shooting an ongoing Web Series, was in a Play, shot a Commercial, continued running my Acting Coach Biz, went to Paris (first stamp in my passport EVER) and started Pre-Production on my show.  With that bag of mixed nuts you've thrown my way this year, I stand in gratitude that 2014 is a wee few hours away.  

In short, Sir, I am officially breaking up with YOU.

I also learned and was reminded of a few other things:

1. Marriage can be pretty rad when it's to the right human.

2. Finding out you have cancer, in any form or type, is one of the most amazingly terrifying phone calls to receive on a Tuesday morning as you're making tea.

3. I learned humility, gratitude, freedom, love and faith in ways I never would have otherwise learned if it weren't for having papillary thyroid cancer in the first place.

4. I was reminded that the essence of humanity is better and kinder than we sometimes assume and think. 

5. I learned how to keep kicking fear square in the jaw.

6. I was reminded that there is so much worth fighting for in this world.  It's easy to get caught up in the minutia of little insanities and to allow the cyclone to take you down.  It's harder to get up with a quiet fist raised in the air and KEEP FIGHTING.

7.  I made new friends who carry the most amazing light in them and I lost touch with friends who swim in the aforementioned cyclone...

8.  Old beliefs with new lifestyles are not the way to go.  This goes for every aspect of life from Acting to how I do my hair now to personal relationships to producing a brand new show.

9.  Our minds really can dictate the outcome of a situation when it's Intellect guiding decisions vs emotions running the game.

10.  Loss sucks.  It doesn't matter how you shake it or how much you try to deny it, be numb to it, ignore it, gloss past it... Loss of someone you love, even if you are certain they are out of pain and in a better place kickin' it in Heaven, simply sucks.  I learned to allow loss to suck and not try to stuff it down or pretend.  It's a little easier to deal with and move through when you look at the truth of the situation instead of letting your mind weeble wobble all over the place.  The pain exists, but it's not the same as torturing ourselves with pretend-ville. 

11.  I am capable of more love in my life than I ever knew possible.  If you would have asked me four years ago if I thought it possible to live in real joy and real strength in love during a massive s**t storm, I would have questioned your sanity.  But here I am, attesting it as a real truth.

12.  Support can come from every angle when we need it the most and can be totally unexpected--especially when we're open to receiving it.

13. Everyone IS a fascinating living and breathing story of life.  If we stop and listen and engage and relate... What we learn is immeasurable and the light that comes with what we learn is contagious and infectious and....... INSPIRING.

Peace, Love, Success and LIFE.

Michelle Tomlinson

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